S1:E27 | Jessica McIntosh, Manifesting Generator 1/3: Accentuate The Real You

AYD 27 | Accentuate The Real You

When you're on a photo shoot, you really have to accentuate the real you. You shouldn't always be trying to be a perfect version of yourself. You have to be the real you because real-life is beautiful. Learn how to accept who you truly are with your host Baeth Davis and her guest Jessica McIntosh. Jessica is a branding and portrait photographer from Nashville, TN. She believes that photography is the best way to show your true self. Learn what being a manifesting generator means when it comes to understanding your future. So listen in and don't be afraid to take up space so that you can be the best version of yourself.

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Jessica McIntosh, Manifesting Generator 1/3: Accentuate The Real You

On this show, I bring on people who I feel are fully embodied in their purpose. They're living their purpose out in the world, getting paid to do the work they love doing and are in their genius zone. They are also people that I find uplifting. They provide a lot of hope, insight, inspiration, education and illumination into how you can be more fully in your life. When I say embodied, I mean in your physical body. You feel your butt on the chair, your feet on the ground and the tips of your fingers. You're connected to you. When you're connected to yourself, that's when you can bring your greatest gifts to the world. I'm so happy to have you.

Our audience keeps growing. Our focus is on what stops women in particular from being visible in promoting their business. What is it that gets in the way? What can we do about this dilemma or fear of being visible, to put our best foot forward? I want to share about our host. I'm going to share with you a little bit about her. Her name is Jessica McIntosh and she is a Nashville, Tennessee-based branding and portrait photographer who has been doing this work for over a decade. She is the mom of two boys. She's married to a lovely man named Brett and they have been together for years.

She has worked with companies like Gaylord Hotels, Marriott Hotels, Twice Daily, Graystar, Franklin Road Academy, Lifeway Christian Resources, The American Heart Association, White Bison and others. Jessica's experience ranges from executives and business owners looking for personal branding and lifestyle shoots to families who ask her to capture engagements, weddings, maternity, senior pictures and all of life's special experiences in between. As Jessica likes to say, telling your story and helping to see yourself as important is a very powerful thing. She helps you do that with a camera in her hand. Let us welcome to the show the wonderfully talented and generous spirit, Jessica McIntosh.

Baeth, thank you so much. That's a wonderful intro.

You're welcome. It's so wonderful to be with you. You have done two photoshoots for me. I'm a big fan of budget allowing at least one shoot a year but preferably two because we change every six months. You can see it in our appearance and energy. Keeping the visual aligned with where we are in our growth track is important. Before we get into what stops women from being visible and what they can do about it, will you share with everyone how you ended up choosing photography? What led to that? I believe you were a model for a time. You were in front of the camera, and now you're behind the camera, making us look amazing. You do a great job. How did that happen?

I grew up in a home where my mom was committed to videoing and photographing everything. Pictures were early. She had a giant camcorder on her shoulder. Early on, I saw the value of a photograph. When I became a teenager, I started modeling. I would be in front of the camera and ask a photographer, "How are you making me look like that?" I was fortunate to be surrounded by people who would tell me. They started to show me what lighting did, what cameras they were using, how they edited things and all of this. It was such a fun time.

I fell in love with the fashion, the dresses and the beauty side of photography. When I was about fifteen, my dad passed away suddenly from a heart attack. Those photos that my mom had spent so much of my childhood capturing suddenly became the only means that I had to look back at my past. That history and value took on a whole new meaning for me. I had this value of history and where you came from mixed with the love of beauty and fashion.

AYD 27 | Accentuate The Real You
Accentuate The Real You: Women give so much of their time to other people and not themselves. They need to give themselves permission to spend time on themselves so that they can figure out who they are.

Somehow that intermingled into what my photography journey has looked like, which is both making sure things are beautiful, fun and vibrant but honoring people, specifically women, where they come from, who they are and who they want to be remembered as. It's important and valuable to me. Here I am, many years later. I went to a photography school and did all that. I worked under different photographers in the industry, got to understand the technical side of things that we need to know and have grown in this space over the years.

What do you think are 2 or 3 of the major reasons that women in business struggle with getting in front of the camera?

There's a list for sure. I can come up with about a million different things. Number one is time. As women, oftentimes, we give so much of our time to other people, whether it's our families if you have a family, relationships or work but not to ourselves. It's giving themselves permission to spend time on them, figuring out what they want and who they are and not propelling everything forward all the time. I would say time. We are constantly telling ourselves this story, "At some point, I will be worth putting myself out there and in front of the camera. I finally have lost enough weight, looked a certain way, and gotten to a certain point in my career. Things will slow down."

There's a list of things that we can create in our head to say, “Not yet. Not like I am now. Nobody wants to see this.” It's this story that we will oftentimes tell ourselves. The permission that we have to give ourselves to invest in ourselves and the permission and courage to accept ourselves as we are and to say that we are worthy of being seen and visible as we are, not a future version of ourselves but who we are now, whatever that is are worth being seen.

Anytime we get together, talk about women and get in a room, few women ever tell me, "I love having my picture made." Nobody says that. Everybody is like, "I hate getting my picture made." My goal is to help women leave a photoshoot and say, "That was fun. I feel good and seen. I know that I'm worth being visible to my community, not just for the sake of doing it but for the greater good." What you have to bring to the table, people need to see. We have to remind each other of that constantly.

How did you conquer those insecurities in yourself? What was the process Jessica took herself through? You're a mom, wife and daughter. You have all these roles. Women have all these roles. You're a confident and integrated person. What did you do for you to foster this confidence you have to be also a business owner?

Thank you for saying that and affirming that in me. It's a process. I have not arrived. It's a struggle when I say to myself and my kids, "We're going to have family pictures taken of us. I'm going to put my face on our Christmas card." That has nothing to do with my business. That's a personal hurdle. We look at photos of ourselves and immediately before we can say something good, we have to say something bad or deprecating or acknowledge that this isn't quite perfect enough before we can say, "That’s nice. That's fine." It's a constant practice for me.

Accept yourself as you are and say that you are worthy of being seen.

The 30-year-old version of me versus the teenager of me that was a model is different. It's learning to accept and appreciate myself and the people I love around me. My kids don't look at me and say, “Mom, your arms are too big to be in a picture. Your face is too wrinkly to be in a picture. You have too many zits on your face to be in our picture.” My children might have commented on my acne. That's usually a harmless and an observation more than anything. They hug me and love me.

I want to remember what life was like with them and for me. Life does not always fit in this box. If we only remember the pretty and perfect Photoshopped versions of ourselves, we are leaving out such a big chunk of our lives and who we are. I constantly say that I preach to the choir and myself is that real life is beautiful. I have to believe that if I'm going to empower other women and give them the gifts, their real-life and who they are is beautiful. I'm constantly saying that to myself. It's hard. There are good days and bad days.

What would you suggest to women and even men in this instance who know that they need to be visible and yet feel hesitant for whatever reason? What would you suggest that these individuals could do to bolster their confidence pre-photoshoot? I'm always nervous before a photo shoot. I'm an extroverted and relatively confident person, but even I get sweaty palms and sweaty brows and get a little anxious about how it is going to turn out. If someone is shy and they're more on the introverted scale in terms of their personality, what are some things people can do to bolster their confidence?

A photoshoot is so vulnerable. We are letting another person see us at every moment, blink and turn, “Is this okay? Is that okay?” It would make complete sense that we're nervous. Even the most extroverted beautiful and confident person like you is still going to feel a little insecure at that moment. If you are on the edge, anxious, shy, and trying to talk yourself up to doing this, number one, you're worth it where you are and you have to do nothing else to get yourself ready for this. You are ready because you are great, just like you are. Sit down and think about what it is that you want to show. I would to stop looking and scrolling Instagram because that comparison is a thief of joy.

You are going to talk yourself out of it, "I don't look like this person. I don't know how to pose like that. I can't." Number one, quit scrolling and write down what you want, what makes you spark, what it is that makes people attracted to you, what is your gift and what are you giving the word and think about how you are want to show that. For one person, a great headshot and a couple of banners or lifestyle images could be all that they need. There are other people that may need rotating content. You might have to think ahead and plan for the year about what you need to show to grab people's attention in this visible world.

You need to think about who you are, what you have to offer the world and how you want to show that, "What do I need? What do I want to show?" Even if you don't hire a professional photographer right away, start practicing by showing your real life. We're great at the selfie. We have all mastered a good selfie, I'm sure. Take a selfie or start revealing little parts of yourself as you start to get comfortable with it. I do highly recommend working with a professional and talking to them before talking with the photographer to make sure that your personality is chill.

If you're shy and reserved, this person is in your face and all over the place, you might retreat into your shell and not feel like you at all. Maybe you're the opposite. Maybe that person could help pull something out of you. Interview some photographers. Just because you talked to someone doesn't mean you have to hire them. Anytime I talk to a client, I'm there to listen about what their needs are and tell them how I could meet those needs. It's up to them to decide, “I feel like she could help me get the results that I'm looking for.”

AYD 27 | Accentuate The Real You
Accentuate The Real You: Photoshoots can make you feel so vulnerable. So if you're shy, remember that you're worth it wherever you are. And, really think about what you want to show. What makes you spark or attractive?

Interview people and don't feel like you have to look at a website and make your decision from there. You might be able to but if personality and helping you with posing, feeling comfortable in front of the camera or even deciding what you want. Maybe you need someone that's going to be a little bit more hands-on than showing up the day of. That's all research that you can start to do before. That's going to help put you at ease and take the hot seat off of you. You get to interview your photographer a little bit to find out if they're going to be a good match for you. That's going to be a vulnerable time, so you want to make sure they will match your energy or help pull out the energy you need.

That's a good point in the sense of feeling emotionally safe and having an emotional connection with the photographer because that's going to elicit powerful expressions. Your body is going to be more at ease if you feel comfortable with the photographer. That is terrific advice.

My favorite one is simply a confidence booster for me. This may not be true for everyone. Get yourself into a position where you're going to feel good and confident. You want to think about your wardrobe. If you need to talk to a consultant about that, do it. You're investing in your business, livelihood and yourself. Don't feel like, "I'll all throw something together last minute." Think about it ahead of time. Talk to a consultant and photographer about what your wardrobe is going to look like so that you're not showing up the day of like, "I don't know." You want to try it on and make sure it feels good on your body and that you feel good and confident in it.

My other favorite thing is hair and makeup. Not making yourself look like you is never what I want people to do. Typically, I like to work with artists that help accentuate what is there and talk to the client about what they want to show and look like. Maybe they want to look so natural. That time in the hair and makeup chair is relaxing. You're investing in yourself and feeling good. It doesn't mean you have to get a crazy eye shadow and lips that aren't like you at all. It's a nice time to relax and reflect. It brings you into your session with this new confidence that I love to see when I photograph people. I see them turn on and I love that.

What are some things an individual could do to prepare for a business branding shoot? You have some great suggestions around that and things to be thinking of in advance of the shoot.

They need to get together their branding colors. If you already have a website or you're working on building one, you need to think about what your brand looks like. That's going to reflect the location for your photoshoot that you will talk to your photographer about and what poses you need to work on. That's also something you've got to decide. Do you need a headshot or a branding session? Those are two different things. A headshot can be a part of a branding session. If you get a headshot, that's just here to here. That's all we're focusing on. You want to make that decision.

What do you need? What photos do you need? Do you need stuff of you in an office or at home? Do you need images of you interacting with clients in whatever your industry is? You've got to think through what that is. Is this a photoshoot to help get you out there and get you visible and feel beautiful? That's okay to say too. You don't have to disguise it as anything else. You need to decide what it is and then communicate that. Think about your branding colors, business, and what type of images you need, whether it's for your website, social media, LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter or whatever you need.

If you only remember the perfect Photoshopped version of yourself, you're leaving a big chunk of who you are. Real-life is beautiful.

You have to think about those things so that the photographer can know. If I'm shooting a banner image, I have to give you a lot of space. If I'm shooting a headshot or something for Instagram, then it's going to be a square. Thinking through what type of images you need is huge. How they will be used is helpful to your photographer. Think through your wardrobe, hair and makeup. These are all little things that your photographer can help you with, like a recommendation. I have packages for my clients where I do all of that for them.

These are the people I work with. They're so great at it. They treat my clients the way that I want them to be treated. I had this great team of people that I could bring in. You've got to think through what do you want for your business and then articulate it. The first time I worked with you, you already had your colors and pictures you sent me. It was so wonderful. That does not necessarily happen every time, but it is so great when it does because it is so helpful. It gives me inspiration to then help create what this world is going to look like for your photos.

One other thing that is a good tip is to remember to get a lot of horizontal shots with open space on the right or left side for your website, Facebook banners and other rectangle-shaped positioning screens. If you're only getting those vertical shots, you don't necessarily have images where you can put an opt-in box, copy, quote or that kind of thing. Before we take a quick look at your Human Design, you are a manifesting generator. Manifesting generators are considered the express builders of the world. You have a gift for knowing which steps to skip.

As a result, it's important you move slowly and methodically and don't rush. It's because you're so efficient you could miss an important step. It's the slowest fast with a manifesting generator because you already move faster than all the other types. You also have the greatest capacity to get things done because of this built-in efficiency. Manifesting generators are good at juggling family, work commitments and multiple businesses. It's what you are built for. The other types are not designed to carry as much, although many try because of societal conditioning.

The manifesting generators are the ones which are designed biologically to take on a lifestyle of juggling various priorities. I would encourage you not to worry about streamlining your life too much because you're always going to have different things in the air. It's the nature of your design. With that, is there one area that you would like to explore? I always ask our guests to share with me one thing that has been rumbling around in there that you are willing to explore at a public show that we could then quickly look at your chart and see what's happening.

I feel like somebody who feels like you can juggle multiple things and keep them going. One of the things that we have talked about is when I slow down and even look ahead so much at 2022, I can feel so overwhelmed or into myself with, "How am I moving forward? What am I doing next?" If I don't have a specific thing that I'm moving towards or a client or if I have something on the horizon, but maybe it's a little farther off, I can start to feel lost in myself in finding that motivation to move forward. I would love to explore that. What do I do when I'm not generating?

It's something to respond to or something that might be motivating. To your question, there are many different ways we could look at what's going to help you stay motivated when you are in a funk, or maybe you've completed a project and you don't know what's next or whatever the reason. One of the things I look at when it comes to work is going over the chart's design side. Mars is the circle with the arrow. When we look at Mars on the design side of the chart, the position of Mars there is about your physical energy. Mars is about that masculine yang part of us that moves things forward.

AYD 27 | Accentuate The Real You
Accentuate The Real You: When you slow down, you can feel overwhelmed so how do you move forward? When you feel like you want to stop moving, that is the best time to actually stop moving and move inward.

For you, you have it in gate 52, which is a gate of stillness. It's called the mountain. If you think about mountain pose in yoga, it's about being still even when it's not so easy to stay still. This would indicate that when you are feeling that things aren't moving, that is the best time for you to stop moving and go inward, meditate, get still or do something like yoga, Pilates, or even a walking meditation. Let's say you go to a nice trail, walk, sit still for a bit, contemplate, walk a little bit more and you sit still.

You have the 9-52 channel, which is an incredible channel to have in any chart. Anyone who has this 9-52 has something special. Let's talk about this because the 9-52 channel in you is all in red. It means this capacity is a little bit unconscious to you, although I bet life has shown you. You have an incredible ability to sit still and handle details. Let's say you finished a photo shoot. You have the ability to then sit down, go through all those photos, organize the photos, pick out the best photos and make suggestions on the photos the person might want to use, all of the things and the details.

The 9 energy focuses in on the details and the 52 keeps your butt in the chair. The thing is, it's a Line 3 energy. It's 52, Line 3 and the lines are right after the decimal point. The first number to the right of the decimal point is never higher than six because there are only six lines in a hexagram. The number to the right of the decimal point will always be in Human Design a number between 1 and 6. Each one of these lines has a different frequency. When we're talking about Line 3, it's about strategy. One of the things that help you move forward is to sit still with yourself and ask, "What is my strategy?"

That would be a good thing for you to think about for 2022, "What is my strategy for 2022?" Look at your calendar and build in the stillness. When are your meditation time, contemplation time, planning time and vacations? Putting more stillness allows you to go further faster. It's counterintuitive. The 9 is part of your core genius. Design Earth is a core genius. Your core genius is the strategy for details. You also have the left eye. Gate 11 represents the left eye. The left eye is the eye that sees new ideas and stories and builds new pathways through imagery.

Photography is perfect, but you already know that. You have a strategy capacity with this 9-52 channel. We've got the 52 in multiple locations, so we know it's important in your design. This 52 energy is a very important fuel. It's the fuel for stick-to-it-iveness and staying all the way through the process of a project. This is an excellent energy to have if you are a filmmaker because making a film is often a 2 to 10-year process depending on the film.

The process you take clients through with their photoshoots is not a one and done in an afternoon. It's a whole process. There's the pre-production, production and post-production. That is where you excel. If I were to encourage you to take your business to the next level as a business consultant, which is pretty much what I am using various tools, I would suggest to you for 2022 to build out a three-part process for your clients.

It's the pre-production, the production itself and post-production. Have the process on your website and have paperwork online that people can fill out for the process. The more detail and yet keeping it simple is the trick. The more detail you can extract from these three phases of the process, the more satisfied you and the client are going to be. This is the essence for you of what moves you forward is your capacity to be more thorough with your strategy.

Once you can do your very best work, client satisfaction will go through the roof.

That's so crazy because oftentimes, with clients, I feel robbed and I feel like I can't even serve them the way I want to when we skip these steps. If I can't do the whole process, I feel like, “If only I had been able to do X, Y and Z. Maybe time or their schedule only allowed for this. Maybe I don't have this process completely laid out for them.” We thought, “We can skip over this.” We can't. I can't. I feel like it does a disservice to them, the process and what they get at the end.

This is a good new boundary for you. This is something you can bring to the forefront with your future work with clients. Perhaps you don't work with people, for example, who are not willing to sign an agreement that they will fully engage with the pre-production, production and post-production processes so that you can do your best work. When you can do your best work, the chance of the client being highly satisfied goes through the roof.

It's all for them. I feel like I can't deliver the best. It will be good. In some cases, all you need is good, but I have this deep desire for it to be the best. It's so interesting even what you were saying those things, me not being aware of them, it's something that I've talked about doing for years. Sometimes you don't have time. I get it, “They need to do this quickly and meet a deadline. We will try to speed this up.” Whenever I do that, I always have this little thing inside of me that's like, “It could have been better.”

As an aside to that, one of the aspects of Human Design is motivation. You and I share the same motivation, which is called desire. There are only six motivations. They are fear, hope, desire, need, guilt and innocence. For anyone with guilt motivation, guilt motivation is finding out where we and other people are guilty of fixing things. It's about fixing things. It isn't about giving people guilt trips. You're going to feel guilty if you don't fix things, at any rate. Desire is about moving things forward. The transference or not-self behavior is going into innocence.

Where are you put off? Putting this in place now is your innocence. Every time Jessica is like, “I'll get to that,” you're going into innocence. When things arise in your life, in the field around Jessica, and even this conversation we're having, that's the universe saying to you, “Direct your desire to these next steps.” What moves you forward is taking space to be thorough and not worrying about how long it's taking to put it in place. It's trusting the methodical step-by-step nature of what it is you're creating. The thing is, if you take 2022 to clean up all your processes, think about where your career can go in the subsequent years.

It's how I can serve the people around me.

You're already very successful. You work as a photographer and have wonderful clients. Imagine what becomes possible when you grant yourself the same space you give your subject.

AYD 27 | Accentuate The Real You
Accentuate The Real You: The idea of taking up space is scary. As a woman, you want to make yourself smaller and then deal with your own personal issues. But by taking up space, you're allowing yourself to serve others better.

What a great word. Thank you for that.

You're welcome. What's the word you're going to take?

Something that's so interesting is what you said about me taking up space. When I take up that space, I'm allowed to take up space. I serve the people around me better when I do it. We have talked about personal life, trauma and that sort of thing. The idea of taking up space is scary. Even as women, we want to shrink back, make ourselves smaller and deal with your personal issues on top of that. Being told that by taking up space and doing the thing that feels almost terrifying to step into, I'm serving better.

The irony is when we live our design rather than our not-self, which is what most humans are doing until they become conscious of it. When we live in our not-self, it will usually go 1 of 2 ways. People either become overly solicitous of others or enablers, as you said about so many women and time. We're coming full circle with our conversation. Women don't make time for themselves. The irony is that when you look at what is in your design and the circuits that are you and make you a priority, your capacity to be there for another person or a group of people and serve humanity with your greatest gifts is unlimited, massive and so fulfilling.

The irony is the more we keep putting ourselves and our whole life on hold, then no one is served. I find it quite a paradox that the more you become a champion of self-love and self-compassion, the more you can serve others. I'm excited about this time. We need to wrap up here. I want to tell everyone to go to JessicaMcIntosh.net and you can see her incredible work. Suffice to say, her website is beautiful and you might recognize the person on the home page. Jessica, are there any final words for our wonderful audience?

Keep going. Be visible. If you're afraid, step into it. Listen to Baeth because I got goosebumps in my little time here and my unmotivated self feels like I need to go run and write all my processes out.

This was wonderful.

Baeth, thank you. I look forward to hopefully getting to talk to more of your tribe and people and helping them overcome that fear of being visible. If they have questions, I live in Tennessee and I do travel. If you can't get here and travel, I'm still happy to help you work through some of those questions to find the photographer that's a right fit for you, wherever you are. Feel free to reach out.

Thank you, everyone. This has been another episode of the show. We will see you all soon.

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About Jessica McIntosh

AYD 27 | Accentuate The Real YouI graduated from Nossi College of Art with a degree in Commercial and Digital Photography and hit the ground running by pursuing hands-on education from other professionals to gain industry knowledge. I’ve worked with companies like Gaylord Hotels, Marriott Hotels, Twice Daily, Graystar, Franklin Road Academy, Lifeway Christian Resources, The American Heart Association, White Bison, and others. My experience ranges from executives and business owners looking for personal branding and lifestyle shoots to families who ask me to capture engagements, weddings, maternity, senior pictures, and all of life’s experiences in between.

Yelena Kalendareva, Manifesting Generator 1/3: Don't Get Caught Up In Your Mind

Your business and family are both important. However, it can be difficult sometimes to find the balance between the two, especially as work gets in the way. This episode’s guest tells you to not get caught up in your mind! After all, she is a manifesting generator, with a journey that will show you that work-life balance is possible. Join your host Baeth Davis as she sits down for a conversation with Yelena Kalendareva on balancing professional and personal life. Yelena is a licensed cosmetologist and she founder of the makeup line called Aneley Cosmetics, which is natural, vegan, PETA certified cruelty free and organic. She takes us in her story of starting her business in such an oversaturated field, highlighting what makes her line different from other mineral lines. Tune in to this conversation to learn about innovation, business growth, and work-life balance.

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Yelena Kalendareva, Manifesting Generator 1/3: Don't Get Caught Up In Your Mind

Our guest is an amazing woman, Yelena Kalendareva. She is a Licensed Cosmetologist. As she began her career, she noticed there was a need not being addressed. As the oldest child and having the responsibility to solve every problem, she founded a makeup line called Aneley Cosmetics. Aneley is her name spelled backward. This cosmetic line is natural, vegan, PETA certified, cruelty-free and organic. It is specially formulated to be safe enough to apply after facials and waxing.

As it has become a favorite to women throughout the world, including yours truly, I love her cosmetics line and I use it every day, she took it even further and she created a private Facebook community called Aneley Cosmetics Beauty, where she teaches busy women, how to apply their own makeup in under five minutes. Aneley is a busy mom of four, a wife to an amazing man, and a businesswoman that makes the world revolve around her family. With that, let's bring on Aneley. Welcome to the show. I'm so happy to have you with us. It's such a pleasure to be with you.

Thanks for having me. I'm so excited.

I'm so glad you're here. I love your cosmetics.

AYD 23 | Manifesting Generator
Manifesting Generator: When you get into an industry that you're passionate about, you just can't help it wanting to push yourself. But it’s important to take a pause and spend time with your family.

I love you. Baeth is such a sweet person inside out. It's such an honor knowing you.

Thank you. I have some questions for you. We're going to look at your human design and that's going to be great because you are in the process of building an empire. How did you start a business in what could be considered a pretty oversaturated field, the world of cosmetics? There are more cosmetic lines coming out all the time. What made you decide to start a business in such a busy field?

I never thought I was going to have a makeup line. This is something people don't know about me. I never dreamed of having a makeup line. I wanted to be a cosmetologist and hairdresser, but when I started in the field, I was doing a lot of facials and I noticed that women were asking the same question, "Can I put makeup on?" The answer was always no.

I am such a people pleaser, especially my clients. I love them much. I'm a problem solver being the oldest child. That's what we do. I started Googling. I said, "There has to be something out there," and I couldn't find it. The idea came to me. "I'll have to research and find how I can get a line of foundations at least so that women can cover their face when they leave."

It took years, it wasn't overnight, but when it happened, I was ecstatic. I was like, "Oh, my God." I brought foundations to my customers. I said, "Here. Try this." When one woman tried it and said, "I love it," and another one. As time grew, they were asking, "Can we have lipsticks in the line and this on the line?" I said, "I need to register the brand. I need to make a brand."

It was such a strange feeling and that imposter syndrome kicked in, "Do I really have a brand? Am I allowed to have a brand? Is this something I can do?" It was huge. I had babies at the time. From the problem, I created a solution. That was the only reason that brand again was born. It took a completely different turn and they evolved later on, which was amazing too. It started out with solving a simple problem.

It seems that the problem you were solving was very much in response to the people in your environment asking for this solution.

That was the only reason.

You didn't even have to think it up. It was presented to you.

Another big reason is I worked with women that were busy at corporate work. When they had events at night and they needed that facial done, they would cover everything up with their makeup because after the facial you're red and exposed. Now, they were free to get a little mini facial or waxing during their lunch break, apply the makeup on and they were fine throughout the day. It pushed them to do more services during the day instead of coming in on the weekends or in the evenings. It's like a small problem from facial turned into this whole phenomenon. It was crazy.

It created more business for you because they weren't putting it off.

I didn't have to stay out too late in the salon and I didn't have to sacrifice the weekends. It all worked out together. All I had to do was push the limits a little bit above my limited beliefs that I could do it and solve that problem. It helped me, in the end as well, which is interesting.

Women are too busy with corporate work and watching over the kids so businesses should start looking for solutions to ease some of their hardships.

Tell us a bit about what makes your line different from other natural mineral cosmetic lines. I'm very curious about this. What makes it different?

I get compared to so many brands. A lot of brands are doing the best they can, but for me, it was important to find out what minerals are. Is there an ethically sourced mineral or non-ethical sourced minerals? When I discovered there are so many unethically sourced like there is child labor involved and horror stories. If you google unethically sourced minerals, you will never wear another mineral line. We took it further. It costs much more to make sure everybody's over eighteen and in a safe environment to mine it. That's number one.

Number two, it's a pharmaceutical grade. You cannot apply cosmetic grade on your face when you're doing such treatments as facials, microdermabrasion. Your skin is exposed, so you definitely need something that is pharmaceutical grade. It's a higher grade, the way that we clean it. We have medical professionals on board as well when we're testing everything. There are no nanoparticles, which are very toxic. There are no artificial colors. It seems like it's not enough. We don't have like a million colors, but all of these colors are naturally from mining. It's mica.

We don't test on animals. We've never tested on animals. We don't have any animal-derived ingredients. I don't have any animals, but I have kids. I feel like they're all babies and no one should be touching them. I test them on myself, on my staff and we're only testing the pigments and the formulation. If you have to test the cosmetics on an animal, it is that toxic. Why are you even producing it? You need to find out if it's safe enough to put on a human, why are you even producing it? That was a big thing for me.

Another thing is when I started out, I called the FDA. This is something a lot of people in the world don't know. I said, "I want it certified, whatever you were certifying. I have a cosmetic line that I opened.” They said, "We don't do the certify. You have to do your thing." I said, "It's impossible. You're the FDA." I got upset and I started googling stuff.

I found the European Union. The European Union at that time had 1,376 banned ingredients. I printed all of them. It was a lot of pages. The whole night, me and my mom, we were sitting and looking through all the ingredients and making sure we didn't have even one of them in the line. Not only are we compliant and safe in the United States, but also the Japanese Union and European Union. We got PETA certification, which was amazing. We're part of the Environmental Working Group. I wanted people to trust me, but I know people don't know me personally. The only way to trust me is to get certifications in reputable places.

One of the biggest things that differentiate me from many other brands is I take it personally. If I'm not wearing it, no one's wearing it. I pulled a couple of products off the market because we had cross-contamination of something that we brought in as a source ingredient. I'm very on top of it. Another thing is I am connected with my customers. I love listening to them. I created this group because people were, "I want more access. I don't just want the videos."

When I go live, I am able to hear back. I'm able to see everyone. I want to know what issue you're trying to solve. Can I help you? I have a salon. I've had it for many years. I am such a people person and I wanted the same thing with my makeup clients because I can't physically be with them because they're everywhere all over the world. Thank God for the internet. I'm able to connect with them on a more personal level. Those things are what make me very much unique from many other brands.

I have a question for you. You have four children who are young. How do you manage being a good partner to your husband, the mother of four children and running this fast-growing business? How do you stay sane and look as rested as you do now?

I still nurse my son. I always say this to any new business owner, your first business is your family. There are no sacrifices. Your child should always see you. I've never missed an event ever of my kids. That's number one. Number two, you need support, your husband, wife, grandma and mom. There's got to be somebody there that will help you. If you have an event and you need to be there, somebody's going to come and watch the kids. Also, you need to create some boundaries.

When you get into an industry that you're passionate about, you can't help yourself. You want to be everywhere. You're so excited. "I want to fly there." I get a lot of people that want to fly me here and there. I've done it sometimes, but I'm not pushing it. I give myself boundaries. My kids have to see their mother. They have to know their mom. Until my kids were six years old, they didn't even know that I was at work because I would make sure that I picked them up from daycare. I made sure that they see me at home. I would come home and I would sit with them.

My older ones are twelve months apart by choice. We wanted that. I came home with them. I would shut off the phone and sit with them. We would be rocking a chair and telling stories. As I got busier in the business, I have a lot of lives. I have a lot of events, red carpet, Golden Globes, I sat my husband down and I said, "I'm going to need you to step it up. Otherwise, we'll never be where I want to be." He's also busy. He has real estate. He's doing his own thing.

It was hard, but you got to bring in your family. It takes a village. You need to set the boundaries. You got to have some hours. Sundays are my family days. Shabbat, which is Saturday, we're at home. It's a holy day. When I got married, I was like, "No, I'm not keeping Shabbat. It's not going to work." With time I realized that, "Thank God I have this day. Otherwise, I'd be working that day too." There's a reason for it and I needed it. You have to prioritize.

AYD 23 | Manifesting Generator
Manifesting Generator: The manifesting generator has been known as a defined sacral. It's this box down here and the sacral is essentially our sex chakra.

We will take a look at your human design now and we'll tie that in with where your company's going. This is known as the body graph and it's a circuit board of the major energies running you through your body. Anything in white, Aneley is not you. It's essentially not activated. Whatever's in color is what you're meant to express, feel and actualize.

Before I even saw your chart, my hunch was that you are a manifesting generator. Let's talk about what that is for anyone who's new to the show and you're new to human design. This is your first introduction. The Manifesting Generator has what's known as a defined sacral. The sacral is our sex chakra. It's the warehouse of energy in the physical body. You can see that yours is in red. It's lit up. About 70% of humanity has this definition in the sacral.

There are four motors in human design, including the sacral are connected up here to the throat. We've got what's called a manifesting generator. The only pure manifesting generator channel is this 34, 20. Imagine in your body, there's a channel of energy that runs from your ovaries and uterus and it runs right up to your throat.

It's the energy where when you say you're going to do something, you then have to do it. Words become deeds. It's an incredibly powerful energy. I felt it in you before I ever saw your chart. I'm like, "She's a manifesting generator because only a manifesting generator could get as much done as you do and still look well-rested, even if it's the makeup.”

There's no one that can get things done quite like a manifesting generator because that sacral is a powerhouse of energy. It's the generator in your body. Sometimes during a storm, the power will go out and restaurants and hotels have those giant generators that come on to keep the power going and keep the air conditioning on or the heat on.

You can hear it humming in the background. You have one of those motors in your body. Your job every day is to get up, burn down all the energy and pass out asleep. The battery builds back up while you're sleeping and then you get up the next day and you get back at it. You have this incredible sustaining power with this design. It is phenomenal.

The other thing you have going for you is that all the centers of definition are connected to each other. The solar plexus is the emotional center. It connects right through the mating channel and you've got four children. That's perfectly appropriate for someone having the mating channel. It's about children and creating other things too. It's about creation. You're here to create. Babies, books, businesses and money, that's what you do.

Everything is connected. The mating channel goes into the sacral. It connects to this amazing manifesting generator channel. This G center in the middle is a magnet. Think of it as the gravitational force of your body. It also connects up to the throat. What you've got here is something called a single definition. Meaning anything defined is all connected.

Single definition people can move faster than all the other types because there's not a break in your internal energy. You're a single definition manifesting generator. The thing is, people may try to keep up with you but they should not because they won't succeed unless they're built like you. There are other people built like you. There are other single definitions manifesting generators, but for the rest of us, we can watch in awe as you juggle all these different things going on in your life.

I always ask guests before the interview, what's up that you want to focus on in the reading, so we can hone in because I'm not going to explain the whole Human Design System. There isn't time. I'm going to try to give you information that you can use and our audience can use. You're already quite successful. You have thousands of customers. You have a wonderful following. I'm a regular customer. I love your products. I try to tell everybody to use them. I like promoting you. It's a joy. I like being an ambassador for Aneley Cosmetics.

You asked me, is there a block to scaling? You said something very important to me before the interview. You said, "In my mind, I have a giant manufacturing facility and I'm living in a bigger, grander house with my husband and my children. In my mind, I'm internationally wholesaling to the world and we can drop ship from anywhere and it's really fast. In my mind, I have a team that is completely dedicated to the way you are to what you are creating. How can I be faster and efficient?" Then you said, "Why am I not there yet?"

There are two things going on here. The why you're not there yet, it's not exactly true. I'm going to explain to you where that question comes from and then I'm going to show you that you're going to get there. You will get there. It's in your design to get there but you've got to be patient. At the top of the design, we have what's called the Ajna, which I've checked off. That's your frontal cortex. It's the front part of the brain. This represents the head, which is the rest of the gray matter behind your forehead. Taken together, those two centers equal the physical mind. You can see that you have both of them in white. They're not defined.

Your first business is your family. Your child should always see you. Shut your phone and sit with them. You have to prioritize.

Your head is totally open and your mind is undefined. It has one gate. Anything in white will either be open or undefined. For example, your heart here is undefined. It has gate 26. If it didn't have gate 26, it would be considered open. Up at your head, there are no gates at all. This is open. Your Ajna is what we call undefined. As a result of this, what can happen is your mind gets a picture of what things should look like. Your body starts to feel agitated, frustrated and annoyed that life isn't matching the picture in your mind, but here's the deal. Your mind doesn't know anything.

Think about how your cosmetic line came into being. You didn't think that up. People came to you and said, "I need something I can put on after a facial because I have this work event tonight. What do you have?" "We'll have to create something." How you're designed is to be in response to your environment and wait for things to come to you, so then you can take action.

If you try to use your mind to control your life, you will get exhausted, which isn't to say the pictures in your mind are incorrect. They're showing you a future that you desire. The challenge is to stay in the moment and trust this process. Enjoy its unfolding because the mind for all of us doesn't know what's going on because your head is open, you're always being flooded with a million inspirations. Plus, your neocortex has gate eleven, which is the gate of ideas. You have more ideas than anybody.

It doesn't mean you need to fulfill all of them. Write them down. Some of them will be for other people. Some of them you will fulfill. The whole thing for you is to not get caught up in what your mind is telling you and say, "I got to do what's going on right here." You will have this international business and a bigger manufacturing facility, and all of it will unfold. If you try to move at the pace of your mind, you'll always feel behind because the mind is dealing in the air. It's dealing in pictures.

Your physical body can't move that fast, even though you move faster than everyone else unless they're built like you. You are the fastest horse, but the fastest horse wants to go even faster. Remember, you've got four children, a husband and a business. It's not like you're some single person who's devoted to the business and doesn't have any other obligations. Then maybe you could move a little bit faster, but you might be lonely, especially since you have this mating channel. You're made to be in a relationship and have children. It's correct for you.

You're doing all the right things. It's just that your mind is always saying more and what I would suggest to you is to start noticing that. You're very smart. You're so fast. Develop a discipline where you say, "Thanks for sharing. I'm doing fine," because the more you relax and slow down, the faster the success will come. For you slow and patience is fast, being very intentional, "There is another idea, that's fine. I'm going to write it in my idea journal and forget about it for now. I have these things right in front of me to do." Does that make sense?

It makes sense. It's fighting me now.

You're not fighting yourself. You're fighting your mind. The mind thinks it's in control. What's interesting about the history of human design and the evolution of the physical body is that up until 1781, human beings did use their mind for decision-making. We went from being 7 chakra beings to 9 centered beings. We mutated in 1781. We have another mutation coming. Living creatures are always mutating. In this mutation, the decision-making move, not from the mind, but down into the body. For some people, it moved out into the environment.

For you, this is the key piece. You make your decisions emotionally. 50% of people have a defined solar plexus. I'm also an emotional decision-maker. The beautiful thing about being an emotional type is that we're warm, friendly and vivacious. If we're sad, we cry. If we're angry, we get mad. People pretty much know how we feel because we can't hide it.

The challenge is this emotional center gives you these emotional waves. If you try to make a decision to stop the emotional wave, it's not going to be the right decision. For you, everything is about waiting until you're calm. Let the wave settle out. Notice in your gut, how you feel and that's how you make the decision.

You've been doing that correctly already. People came to you with a suggestion for this new makeup line. You were listening. People kept asking. You did something about it. That's being correct. As a manifesting generator, you're built to be in response to your environment and in response to your emotional wave.

When the wave is quiet, you can make a decision, but you don't want to get caught up in your mind, going more because you'll never get to enjoy what's happening now. I have a solution for you. It's very simple. All you need to do is ask yourself in any given situation, "Am I satisfied? Am I satisfied with how I look now? Am I satisfied with this meal? Am I satisfied with this new product we're adding to the product line? Am I satisfied with how my kids are doing?"

It's a feeling of satisfaction. As long as you let satisfaction guide you and not frustration, you'll be golden. How do I know you're going to get there? You have gate 45, which is one of the money gates. Gate 45 is big money. I call this the gold toilet money. It's the queen energy. In a man, it would be the king. These days, people have been calling themselves whatever they want. It's either queen or king. I'm assuming you'd go with the queen.

As the queen, you are here to teach your community what you know, which is exactly what you're doing. In teaching them, you help them become inspired and more prosperous. That's one of your gifts. It's like that cornucopia that's overflowing. You have a natural affinity to build big things and to make them very profitable. You have to be patient with it.

You also have gate 26, which is the ability to do the deal. To figure out what's necessary for the deal to be successful. Those are very strong business energies. The other thing you have going for you is that you are a 1-3 profile. There are twelve profiles and the 1-3 profile is known as the expert. You're an expert at what you do. The 1 is the researcher. It’s like you talking about and figuring out what chemical shouldn't be in the makeup and printing out all those pages. That's what the 1 does. The 3 is the strategist that shows people how.

You're already doing your purpose. That's why I wanted you on the show because you're already successful. You're already there. It's reminding yourself, "I'm already there." Let your head watch. I call it the bobblehead. Let your head observe your life and be amazed as it unfolds in this magnificent way. In ways you couldn't even imagine because manifesting generators don't get to know what their life's going to look like. All that matters is that it satisfies you. It’s not how much money you make and not how powerful you are, although that's all in your design to be wealthy and be powerful. It's going to happen because it's built into the mechanism.

AYD 23 | Manifesting Generator
Manifesting Generator: There's something that a lot of businesspeople don't realize: their image. They have the product, they have the service, but branding is not there.

The main thing for you is to enjoy the journey, so you don't miss the moments being up in your head going, "It's not enough. I need it bigger." It's like, "I'm doing great." That's what you need to remind yourself. You're doing all the right things. You do the research, teach people how and you are building the brand. As you know, it hits a tipping point where then it goes international, but first, you're building up the brand awareness.

You're building up your brand ambassadors to spread the word about what you're doing. You're doing all the right things. The only thing I might encourage you to do is start building the team out more and get more help before you need it. For example, if you have a goal or a dollar amount, say in the next twelve months. I would encourage you to ask yourself, "Who do I need on my team to make that happen?"

Get those people now. You've got to get them before you get that busy. The best thing for you when your mind is going “more and more,” is to take a step back and look at the whole operation and say to yourself, "If I want to get to that goal, that's wonderful, but who do I need right now to support me?" How is this landing for you? Does this all make sense?

It does, especially with the 1-3.

You're the expert.

That's exactly what I do. I dig up the information, and then I share it away in a very simple way, so people can actually understand it. I love doing that.

It’s like how to put on your makeup in five minutes or less, which I'm able to do now. It's amazing to me. It used to take me 20, 30 minutes but not anymore. Thanks to you. It's great. You have such a gift. You inspired me. In your business structure, you're designed to communicate systems to people, a whole system of makeup applications. That's why it's good if people buy your whole system if they get the primer, foundation, and they get the different things because then they've got all the tools, they need to achieve that look and that feel.

The other thing you've got going for you is you're naturally an entrepreneur. You're great with focus and details, and the staying power. When I look at this chart, it's like, "Wow." It doesn't surprise me because from where I sit, I think of you as one of the most successful people I know on a life scale. Success isn't bigger and better. Success is your children, husband and you are happy. You're satisfied. That is a crowning achievement. Not everybody is able to do that. Kudos to you.

I was not expecting this.

No, most people don't. It's pretty amazing.

I'm amazed. I am pleasantly surprised. I'm much calmer. I will take all those and stop listening to my mind so much.

Don't trust your mind. It doesn't know what's up. Take notes and then watch your emotions and wait for the calmness to kick in before you make a decision.

My biggest thing is education.

You're here to educate. The more you educate, the more successful you become. I would encourage you to build out a YouTube channel. You were probably already doing it. All the social media, Instagram, all of them, be on there with all your content or your show.

You have to be able to listen and respond always with grace, always with respect.

I created nine modules. I didn't launch it because I'm in my head. It's a perfect little mini tutorial on how to do your makeup and whatever and it's just sitting there. I already sent it out to a few people to test out and they're like, "You've got to launch it. It's so good." In my head, "Did I put enough in there? Is it enough? Will people be wowed?" I'm always in my head.

You could make that program a bonus if they buy a certain amount of cosmetics. You spend this dollar amount, you get access to the course, otherwise charged for the course. You don't have to charge a lot but charge for it. You have an event coming up with our wonderful friend, Claire Chen. Would you like to share with everyone about this event?

Claire is in fashion and I'm in the beauty industry. We've been working with so many women, especially in business, we realized that there's a huge gap. There's something that a lot of business people don't realize and that's their image. What do they look like? How do people see them? I know so many women who go through YouTube, Google things and Instagram.

They can't figure out their style. They can't figure out their signature makeup, signature style, where they need to wear. The presentation is not there. The branding is not there. They have the product and service, but they don't have the walking billboard. We decided to do a masterclass. It's for two hours. We're going to do more of those in the future. If somebody read this late, that's okay.

We teach you how to put on your makeup and create your signature style. How to dress for your body type? How to do a little contouring that's presentable enough and don't spend 70 hours doing it? We put it in a two-hour, very intense and hands-on masterclass. It's going to be on Zoom. This is open internationally because it's virtual. It's going to be 12:00 PM Eastern, 9:00 AM Pacific, and 5:00 PM UK. The timing we chose was pretty accessible and it's on a Sunday. We'll be very happy to have you there. It's only open to twenty people at a time. If you'd like to get on it, then please feel free to reach out.

I would invite all of you reading this to please join Aneley's Facebook group because you'll get all the updates on upcoming events and you'll know when the next event is happening. Do you have any final words of wisdom for our audience?

You have to be able to listen and always respond with grace and respect. We're losing it now with a lot of these cancel cultures and it's very sad. I want to say to prioritize family. I've always prioritized my family and that's the key to my success. For any beginning business person, who's curious about how to even do this, think of it as help. You're helping someone. The more you want to help, the more you're going to succeed. Thank you so much for having me. I'm speechless. I'm so thankful.

You're welcome. It's been great having you on. This is a delight. This has been another episode. Be sure to subscribe. Leave a review if you liked it. Please share it with your friends. Spread the good news. Help Aneley's message get out to more people. If you're looking for some fabulous, good stuff to put on your skin, check out her cosmetic line. I'll see you all soon.

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About Yelena Kalendareva

AYD 23 | Manifesting GeneratorChoose from a wide veriety of services: Cosmetology Services, Make-Up Services, Hair Extensions.

Specialties: Salon Owner in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. Licensed Cosmetologist, Stylist, Certified Make-Up Artist, Certified Hair Extension Technician, Certified Brazilian Hair Straightening Technician.

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